Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Randomize
