At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
