i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
