He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
