You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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