I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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