People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
