So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
