I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
accomplished twins. life is a go
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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