At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
