haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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