i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
