Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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