She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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