You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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