I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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