yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
