I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
