I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
