i just wanna soil my oats bro
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
