There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
