So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
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