im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
