She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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