it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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