apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
That accounts for only three of the penises
You pole danced in your parka.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize