i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I think your dad took our porno
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
