On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
nutella sex= disaster
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
