it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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