I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize