I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize