Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
