remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
