Welp...herpes.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
