We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
