and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
