hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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