So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
