But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Operation Purity has been aborted
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
