Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I need to align my fucking chakras
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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