hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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