He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
