Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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