I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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