Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
