I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
