If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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