I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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