I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
