nut hugger
It was confusing and full of hummus
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
