Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
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